Comments on: Mommy Guilt http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/ Just another Myswiftblog Blogs weblog Thu, 27 Aug 2009 07:07:44 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Lara N. http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-30 Lara N. Mon, 25 Aug 2008 13:09:28 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-30 First, a note about formula - Similac reportedly has the least amount of Bisphenol-A (BPA) in their dry formula cans, compared to other brands, including earth's best. We use Similac Organic. To breastfeed or not to breastfeed is a difficult decision. I had twins and wanted to breastfeed with all my heart, but was diagnosed with IGD (insufficient glandular development), so even after herbal treatments, domperidone, and serious praying, I could only provide about 1/3 of what my babies needed. I even had to pump because the flow was so slow, the babies would get frustrated and clamp on so hard that I bled. Finally after 6 1/2 months, one day I got chest pains and a numbness on my left arm. And that was it for breastfeeding! It was still a hard decision. Anyway, I pumped a little extra to store in the freezer in case the girls got sick and needed a 'booster shot' of mommie's antibodies, and put them on the formula. Breastfeeding was an ordeal and a half! I'm glad I did it, but it was SO difficult and stressful. I had such a hard time giving them the formula at first. I felt like I was giving them poison or something. Then my lactation consultant (the best in two counties) told me to think of it as giving them medicine that they needed to survive. That helped. She also said that if breastfeeding was so stressing and exhausting me, it would do more damage to breastfeed the girls and be unable to lovingly care for them because I was all cranky and tired. She said she'd rather I formula fed, got more sleep and was in a more positive frame of mind, which the girls would sense. She even said that she'd personally hand me the formula bottle herself if it would help, because it was definitely best for all concerned that I stop the breastmilk. Once I got used to the formula feeding, I didn't feel so bad. The girls were fine (apart from constipation), and I started them on solids by 7 months (and prunes - goodbye constipation :) ), and switched the formula with milk at 12mos. They're just fine - although they insist on daily boob inspections. They like to yank open my shirt and reassure themselves that mommy's boobs haven't run away since they last had a look. Now, if I can just get them to stop with the grabbing and twisting, I'll be fine. :) God knows that we're doing what we can. As long as we try our best, it'll be ok. First, a note about formula – Similac reportedly has the least amount of Bisphenol-A (BPA) in their dry formula cans, compared to other brands, including earth’s best. We use Similac Organic.

To breastfeed or not to breastfeed is a difficult decision. I had twins and wanted to breastfeed with all my heart, but was diagnosed with IGD (insufficient glandular development), so even after herbal treatments, domperidone, and serious praying, I could only provide about 1/3 of what my babies needed. I even had to pump because the flow was so slow, the babies would get frustrated and clamp on so hard that I bled. Finally after 6 1/2 months, one day I got chest pains and a numbness on my left arm. And that was it for breastfeeding! It was still a hard decision. Anyway, I pumped a little extra to store in the freezer in case the girls got sick and needed a ‘booster shot’ of mommie’s antibodies, and put them on the formula.

Breastfeeding was an ordeal and a half! I’m glad I did it, but it was SO difficult and stressful.

I had such a hard time giving them the formula at first. I felt like I was giving them poison or something. Then my lactation consultant (the best in two counties) told me to think of it as giving them medicine that they needed to survive. That helped. She also said that if breastfeeding was so stressing and exhausting me, it would do more damage to breastfeed the girls and be unable to lovingly care for them because I was all cranky and tired. She said she’d rather I formula fed, got more sleep and was in a more positive frame of mind, which the girls would sense. She even said that she’d personally hand me the formula bottle herself if it would help, because it was definitely best for all concerned that I stop the breastmilk.

Once I got used to the formula feeding, I didn’t feel so bad. The girls were fine (apart from constipation), and I started them on solids by 7 months (and prunes – goodbye constipation :) ), and switched the formula with milk at 12mos. They’re just fine – although they insist on daily boob inspections. They like to yank open my shirt and reassure themselves that mommy’s boobs haven’t run away since they last had a look. Now, if I can just get them to stop with the grabbing and twisting, I’ll be fine. :)

God knows that we’re doing what we can. As long as we try our best, it’ll be ok.

]]> By: DesertMama http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-29 DesertMama Thu, 07 Aug 2008 00:19:27 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-29 Oh, I remember those weaning days - it was so hard. It is sad, but so is the moment they leave every "baby" stage. On the other hand, it's so exciting when they graduate to something bigger. :) Oh, I remember those weaning days – it was so hard. It is sad, but so is the moment they leave every “baby” stage. On the other hand, it’s so exciting when they graduate to something bigger. :)

]]> By: Steph http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-28 Steph Wed, 06 Aug 2008 16:20:59 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-28 Thanks for the great comments. Laura, congrats on your twins and I admire you for trying to breastfeed two! I can't imagine how time consuming that was. And you're right, the most important thing is a happy, healthy baby! Thanks for the great comments. Laura, congrats on your twins and I admire you for trying to breastfeed two! I can’t imagine how time consuming that was. And you’re right, the most important thing is a happy, healthy baby!

]]> By: Laura http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-27 Laura Wed, 06 Aug 2008 14:49:42 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-27 I was one that struggled with infertility for seven years before finally concieving our wonderful twins. I, also struggled with breastfeeding. I really wanted to breastfeed, but the twins were born early and neither one would latch on. After weeks of heartache with syringe feedings (not wanting to cause nipple confusion), we decided to go ahead and give them a bottle with breast milk (they weren't eating much and needed to gain weight). I continued pumping for 5 weeks and continued to try and get them to breastfeed. In the end, it never happened. I was disappointed, but after all of our heartaches of trying to concieve, I realized that I shouldn't sweat the small stuff. The important thing is that they were here and they were healthy. You have done what is best for your child and you will continue doing so. With that said, don't sweat the small stuff and keep up the good work! :) I was one that struggled with infertility for seven years before finally concieving our wonderful twins. I, also struggled with breastfeeding. I really wanted to breastfeed, but the twins were born early and neither one would latch on. After weeks of heartache with syringe feedings (not wanting to cause nipple confusion), we decided to go ahead and give them a bottle with breast milk (they weren’t eating much and needed to gain weight). I continued pumping for 5 weeks and continued to try and get them to breastfeed. In the end, it never happened. I was disappointed, but after all of our heartaches of trying to concieve, I realized that I shouldn’t sweat the small stuff. The important thing is that they were here and they were healthy. You have done what is best for your child and you will continue doing so. With that said, don’t sweat the small stuff and keep up the good work! :)

]]> By: J http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-26 J Mon, 04 Aug 2008 02:33:20 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-26 I think nursing is the one thing that brings on more mommy guilt than anything. I had my second child (a sweet baby girl) in May and both myself and baby had developed an infection at delivery and she had trouble breathing. She had to spend a week in the NICU and trying to nurse was so difficult. Her health was at stake and we ended up supplementing with formula and she got better and was able to come home sooner than expected. The lactation specialists made me feel like the worst, most selfish person. They put me in tears multiple times as I sat with my sick newborn in the NICU. I nursed my first child and really enjoyed the experience, even though I didn't do it for very long. As mothers we all want what is best for our babies and I think it's each mother's choice to do what is right for them personally. Just look at the info you found on the Internet saying that a baby feels abandoned when you wean??? What?? That is just ridiculous. I think we should all stop attacking each other and show some respect and understanding. So here are some words of encouragement--I continued to nurse for a bit after we brought our daughter home, but have since weaned her and I felt sad and guilty just like all mothers do. I think 5 months is a really long time and I applaud you for that. Job well done! My 12 week maternity leave will soon be over and I'll be going back to work. There's another source of mommy guilt. :( I think nursing is the one thing that brings on more mommy guilt than anything. I had my second child (a sweet baby girl) in May and both myself and baby had developed an infection at delivery and she had trouble breathing. She had to spend a week in the NICU and trying to nurse was so difficult. Her health was at stake and we ended up supplementing with formula and she got better and was able to come home sooner than expected. The lactation specialists made me feel like the worst, most selfish person. They put me in tears multiple times as I sat with my sick newborn in the NICU. I nursed my first child and really enjoyed the experience, even though I didn’t do it for very long. As mothers we all want what is best for our babies and I think it’s each mother’s choice to do what is right for them personally. Just look at the info you found on the Internet saying that a baby feels abandoned when you wean??? What?? That is just ridiculous. I think we should all stop attacking each other and show some respect and understanding. So here are some words of encouragement–I continued to nurse for a bit after we brought our daughter home, but have since weaned her and I felt sad and guilty just like all mothers do. I think 5 months is a really long time and I applaud you for that. Job well done! My 12 week maternity leave will soon be over and I’ll be going back to work. There’s another source of mommy guilt. :(

]]> By: The Bargain Shopper Lady http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-25 The Bargain Shopper Lady Sun, 03 Aug 2008 11:16:18 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-25 Just a bargain tip: You can get free samples of formula every time you go to the doctor, you just have to ask them. One time my favorite nurse gave me an entire case! I agree that you should not worry about weaning. Five months is a long time! ~The Bargain Shopper Lady Just a bargain tip: You can get free samples of formula every time you go to the doctor, you just have to ask them. One time my favorite nurse gave me an entire case!
I agree that you should not worry about weaning. Five months is a long time!
~The Bargain Shopper Lady

]]> By: munchkinsandmusic http://themommystories.com/31/mommy-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-24 munchkinsandmusic Sat, 02 Aug 2008 19:49:35 +0000 http://www.themommystories.com/?p=15#comment-24 Nursing can be difficult sometimes. Keep it up, it is so worth it! Nursing can be difficult sometimes. Keep it up, it is so worth it!

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